Friday, January 25, 2013

Fear release assignment

Less than 9 weeks away! Whoa, things are snowballing along now! Huzzah!

In general news, Hannah is going fantastically well! Feeling very happy and healthy, and no issues so far, so that's fantastic new. No swollen ankles, no high blood pressure, no cravings for pickles and ice cream (or dirt!!?) at 3am. Everything is going so great, and we're on track for the most amazing birth experience. I'm really, really looking forward to the big day, and Hannah is too, so you can't ask for much more than that.

Coming along nicely!!

As part of our hypnobirthing course, we've been asked to write a list of things that we're still worried about, thinking about, any concerns or issues: emotions, finances, family, health, doubts, life changes, responsibilities, anything at all.

Once we have identified and outlined any existing concerns we might still have, we address the concerns in our sessions, so that we can either move past the fear, or diminish the effects of the concern, so that we're less bothered by it.

My first thought was that seems like an excellent exercise to undertake, irrespective of whether you're having a baby or not! Too often I think we carry stuff around in our heads instead of looking at ways to deal with it.

I've obviously yet to see how effective the session is, but I'm pretty confident. In only 2 classes of hypnobirthing, and a bit of practice, I can already relax much quicker than I've been able to in the past. So that's promising. Our course facilitator is really good, so I'm expecting some positive results. Hannah has been doing her affirmations every day, and is feeling very good about it too.

I figured I might as well share some of the things on my list, for interests sake. I'm not thinking about solution or answers to any of these at this stage. That will happen in due course. This is just a brain dump of things I'll be thinking about in our next class.

Post Natal Depression

Depression and anxiety are two things I'm very familiar with, having dealt with them myself. So it's no surprise that I have the same concern when it comes to Hannah's wellbeing after the birth hormones have disappeared, and we're staring reality in the face. Post natal depression is something to watch out for, and so it makes it onto my list. This isn't a huge concern for me, but worth popping down on my list.

Transfer disappointment

If for any reason we have to transfer off of the home birth program, I think Hannah might be quite disappointed, even though there's nothing that can be done in that situation. We're really keen on a home birth, but there's no guarantees. You can tell yourself that "so long as the baby is ok, we're happy" but the reality is you always have a preference for one thing or the other. So that makes it onto the list.

Complications

An obvious concern for many expecting parents, I would think. Complications during the pregnancy or birth that would adversely affect Hannah and/or the baby. Definitely one for the list.

SIDS

This is always in the back of my mind when we're looking at buying or organising stuff for the baby, so it's obviously something I'm thinking about. Worth bringing up.

Decisions

Come on, everyone is afraid of making the wrong decisions from time to time! This is the sort of stuff like should we or should we not vaccinate our baby, should we do this, should we do that. There's no manual for your own kid, so you have to be Grown Ups and do your research and make the best decision you can... but it's still something that you worry about. I do, anyway.

Work/Life

I really hope I can spend lots of time with Hannah and the baby, around work commitments etc. I have my priorities pretty straight, but it's worth mentioning.

Identity

Am I going to lose my identity when the baby comes along? Experience tells me no, but it's still something I ponder. Will I still be James? What happens to my id? On the list!

Footsteps

I really want to develop my own style of parenting, and not fall into the habits and behaviours that my own parents had. You've heard this one before, people claiming they'll be so different from their parents and then realising that they've turned into their Mother/Father. I'm fairly independently minded, but it's something I watch for. This is like a personal achievement type thing: How do I improve when I do it for myself?

Interference

Given that I'll be at work a lot, I do have a concern that there will be other significant people in the baby's life (besides Hannah) who will get to spend more time during the week with the baby than I will. I don't like the thought of being over ruled, badgered, upstaged or ignored by well-meaning friends and family. Big one for the list.


So that's it for now. It didn't take long to come up with those things, so I'm sure there's probably more stuff if I look long enough and hard enough.

As I said, I'm not necessarily concerned with finding answers straight away, (although I'm sure there'd be people desperate to give me advice!), but more just identifying some of the things that I've thought about or am thinking about. I'll let you all know how the "cleansing" session goes! Let me know if you want to hear any more information about hypnobirthing.

3 comments:

  1. This Hypnobirthing, Is it by Gabrielle Targett?

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  2. We're doing a course which uses the Mongan Method. Started by Marie Mongan

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  3. Just had a look, looks like basically the same sort of thing.

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